2 weeks ago, on March 7th to be more precise, I got to live one of my musical wet-dream fantasies by...attending a Paramore concert!!
Ah, Hayley Williams. Everything Avril Lavigne strove to be but never was. I didn't know why I used to be so obssessed with Avril before. Maybe cuz she was one of the first few to act really against the norm of a typical female popstar and was all angsty and rebellious. But onstage, Avril was bor-ring. And she was equally angsty when meeting her fans too. Guess the one thing I really liked about her though was that she tried to keep it real in the beginning, what with her own wardrobe and style, and she very much acted however the way she wanted and said. She's ended up a very long and different way from where she is now though. (hmm, you know what, wasn't she a bottled-dyed redhead too??)
As for Hayley Williams, I guess one indication that she instead has kept it real? Is her headbanging short orangey-red crop. I am glad she started out in a real band and struggled in the first few years to make it big but still has a good head on her shoulders, both literally and metaphorically. You can tell that she really is thankful with the band that she's in and the success that she's had. Still, it's kinda early to tell. She's at the half-way mark to the stage where 'she thinks about drastic transformation' like Avril did. Av took 6 years and 3 LPs to do a 360 degrees change to look and sound how she does now (that is, barbie-dollish and annoyingly perky). Hayley may or may not be on her way there yet, we don't know. But I sure as hell am loving every minute of who she is now and what she strives and stands for. That is, rocking REAL band music with Headbanging a must, keeping her fashion style simple yet a little grungy and edgy-signaturelly hers, and being grounded, real and wide-eyed with her views in interviews. Oh, and not desperately seeking media attention and publicity like many young MTV stars are constantly craving.
That is why, I faithfully followed her band Paramore since before they released their debut album in Singapore till now, and never lost interest in their goings-on. And that is why I patiently waited for the day they'd come play a show in Singapore because I just know they simply can't ignore the massive loads of fan demands going on and increasing here year after year (did u check out Eventful.com?). There were so many false rumors that they were coming 2 years ago, I knew one of them would eventually come true someday. haha.
BUT, when tickets for their gig here went onsale, I didn't immediately rush out to get my Cat 1 (standing pen) ticket. I was kinda broke. And I needed to find a concert mate first. I waited around in vain. I couldn't find anyone as hardcore as me who was willing to pay $110 for the ticket without any second thoughts. By the 3rd week, tickets for that were sold out :( And that woke me up. I was like, "Are you nuts? You're gonna miss Paramore! The band you've waited around years for you bodoh!" So I then went on ebay to check out the scalpers' prices and they were going for at least $50 more than the original price. I felt a little doomed but still kept my hopes up. I mean, if I wanted something so badly, eventually it'll turn up for me right? (for some reason, the bands and celebs that I've always wanted to meet always eventually work out for me. But that's another story) I just have to be patient. My patience paid off. One fine early Sunday morning, I logged onto Ebay again and saw this new seller with a freaking low 'Buy It Now' price. I messaged his handphone number to ask if we could meet up as I'd buy his ticket pronto, I'd be that reliable and sincere buyer and hoped no one else was already in the queue of buyers. Then, a moment of epiphany came to me, I thought... ... ... ... how stupid am I not to click the BUY IT NOW link first?? So I did just that and thought, there's no way for the seller to back out now and try to sell it for higher. If he does, imma give him a bad name. About 2 hours later, he replied me to ask when to meet up and also the reason why he was selling it (cuz he was going overseas that day). I met him the next day, he was this really tall and skinny young dude who looked like he belonged in a band, with floppy hair and skinny jeans and all, whose friends were with him and seemed to approve of him making such a good deal. I was thinking, 'Your loss and my gain. ha. You're so gonna regret missing a Paramore concert dude.' It felt so surreal as I handed over to him the crisp notes, the bulk of which I had loaned from my brother.
So my first break I took, was to go find some fuel (aka food and beverage) because on the way, I had not spotted any convenience store at the stadium and Tracy told me I could only find one at the Kallang shopping mall which was like, 10 minutes walk away. As I made my way to the front of our queuing group, the security person issued me this wristband pass and told me to come back by 15 minutes. I was like, er, I'm gonna get my fuel and it takes some time for me to accomplish that. I may or may not make it back in time, so there. try to stop me. Well, something like that. And the security guy goes, a bit harried, well, try to make it back as soon as you can, because we have limited passes to give out. I brightly answered, Okie, and got my ass out of that controlled madhouse. At that time, us queuers could hear some band (most likely the opening band Monochrome) soundchecking and so kinda guessed Paramore hadn't arrived yet. I got my fuel and on the way back, I came across a crew member and innocently asked if THE band was here yet. He confidently told me they were not and I made my way back to my queue spot, reporting the news to Tracy. But guess what?? About barely 10 minutes later, Tracy oh so casually mentioned she could hear songs like Decode being soundchecked. And I was like :O was that crew member pulling my leg just now? I soon got antsy. Like, pretty antsy, as before I had arrived at the venue, I was scheming of meeting the band and passing my stash to them. I am not one to be defeated easily, you know? lol.
Less that half an hour after my first break, Tracy declared she needed a break herself, a toilet break, and I as she stood up, I said out loud, 'I'll go with you'. But hung back because we had previously discussed that we didn't want to draw the attention of other fans with our other intentions of looking for the band and also the suspicions of the security person.But after thinking it over for like 2 seconds, I just stood up, told the person next to me to take care of my fuel and hauled my ass out of there for this second 'break'.As I made my way to the front of the group again, there was a sizable number of people lining up and waiting for their passes to be let out. I tried to keep a straight face and played it cool like I'm so bored I just need to go to the loo, when inside, I was like, I can't wait to get out of here fast enough to recce the venue and see if any Paramore members were milling about outside. You can be sure the 15-minute rule was the last thing on my mind. Tracy was already way up front so I told her I'll meet her out by the the toilet a bit later. When I finally got myself a pass and walked to the loo some distance away, Tracy was just coming out, and I was like, I'm not gonna waste any minute longer loitering in the toilet, the suspense is killing me, so let's just go scout about for Paramore first :) So we walked and we walked, and then Tracy oh so casually mentions again 'Oh, that's Justin (one of the guitarists)'. And I'm like, 'omg where?? are you sure??' She gestures in the direction of a man in black with his back turned to us. We walked towards him and he looms closer. I'm like, 'omg, it ao is (he's the same person we saw at the aiport yesterday)! what's he doing??' It seemed he was by himself and talking to someone, who we assumed was probably like, a concert or record label person. While trying not to freak out and gaining on him, I thought, 'no way! what kind of luck have we?? i'm sure any minute he's going to walk off...' ...Suddenly, he was right in front of us! and we saw he was talking to this Asian chick with an american slang and who was like, mere inches away from his face. I thought, 'eww, she's so flirting with him, whoever she is'. We didn't quite know what to do, not wanting to interrupt them, but Justin lifts his head up and sees us and I think Tracy goes, 'hey, could we take a picture with you?' or something and he says hey back and 'Sure!' or something like that. lol.And then the Asian chick suddenly goes all silent and grim and like, backs off from him. I was so expecting her to tell US to back off, but she didn't. So Justin chats with us for a bit first, and I was quite dazed thinking, this is so not happening, i mean, compare this bizarre surreal situation to yesterday's mayhem at the aiport, this is so not happening. Like seriously, there were only the four of us right that. It was like time had stopped. And here he was just chatting to us like it was the most normal thing in the world. Another thing was, he looks kinda different in person than from his pics online, so all the more I was thinking, 'this is so not happening, somebody pinch me'. And I think Tracy was so thinking the same thing, because she suddenly went completely silent. But you know what?? At least I had the sense to pass him my card and book I was lugging around in my backpack. Sweet victory man. I was holding my breath and thinking 'don't let this moment pass me by' as I took them out. Anything else that resulted after that was a bonus. So Justin did mention he saw me twitting pics of my gifts online. And I thought that was cool. And he seemed impressed by the pop-up effect of the card :D Cuz in the pic, I know it looked kinda 2D-ish. Then after that, we took pics. I wanted to take together with Tracy and half wanted the Asian chick to help us, but she was now wearing sunglasses and standing a bit off now, still all silent and standoffish (which Tracy was the first to mention later), so Tracy and I just took pics for each other. Overall, can I just say that he is a really nice guy?? :D
After our Justin encounter and seeing no other Paramore members in sight, we hurriedly made our way back to our queue spot with our adrenaline pumping man. And then we recounted what just happened and were saying, 'we should haves' and 'could haves' of which were a couple were we should have asked him to sign our shirts (she had brought a beautiful self-designed one which she had squished in her tiny pouch, and Justin had said mine was awesome or something though Taylor wasn't on there I realized later, lol) and we should have asked him more questions. lol! BUT, we were immensely grateful we got to have that experience at all, and both agreed it was the grace of God man. :D Sometimes, God does work in mysterious ways. It's like, everytime after I work so hard to meet my favourite celeb, God throws a token encounter with them my way. And knowing how HUGE, like HUUUGE a fan of Paramore's Tracy was, like she has all their albums and a couple of magazines and such which she had brought to the airport, had bought her concert ticket the day it went out onsale, and had wanted to line up at the concert venue at 7am that day but decided at the last minute to just attend church first, it was truly, a miracle essentially. I think I had exhausted my breaks by then, because even if I had tried to go for one more (I hadn't actually made use of my 2nd toilet break properly did i?), it would have been difficult, because they made us stand up to get into the venue soon after.
Once we got in, I had wanted to stand at the side cuz there were way lesser people there, but Tracy seemed adamant to stand in the middle where most of the people were congregated (but you know what's the funniest part? when the concert started, both of us ended up the opposite places of where we wanted to be. She ended up at the side while I stayed in the middle). She was looking out for that Holland girl we met the previous night who had recounted and encouraged us to punch people with our elbow to get to the front when the concerts starts. She seemed like such a pro at doing that, boasting that she could make it all the way from the back to the front in her own country and didn't give two hoots about those standing in her way, so she seemed like a cool person to have around at a gig like that where there were a lot of tall guys around. But alas surprisingly, we couldn't spot her tall blonde figure among the sea of black hair in the moshpit. Surprisingly, Paramore's concert didn't have that many ang mohs! I thought they would turn up in full force but one could see a lot of Malays and boys.
But, there were these two short ang moh girls near me the whole night and who told everyone they were from some neighbourhood primary school (but looked nothing like primary school age), so cute. There was one point where these girls were chatting up a boy and this Singaporean girl in front of me turned around and declared loudly 'You're making conversation in the moshpit!!' I'm like, er, so? This old friend of mine, Gerald who had a paid seat upstairs had also messaged me saying how jealous he was of me now that he saw the moshpit crowd. To cut short my moshpit experience at Paramore, summarily, it was a night of many firsts for me:
1) First time I found myself able to make my way like, ten rows back to be 2nd row center right before the concert started (but I got separated from Tracy though). Like, you could see all the photographers running around. How I accomplished such a feat as this is a secret but Determination has a lot to do with it. *big grin* Check me 3rd row from the front during the opening band's time:
2) First time I found out being in front at a moshpit was a big mistake. Prior to this, I had always LOVED moshpits simply for the fact that I somehow always am the person in front, getting a full front row view of the performers and enjoying myself thoroughly. Seats are not for me. Front row moshpit positions are. But for Paramore, it was not meant to be. Look at the ONLY full-song vid I took while out front, even then, it wasn't as good a vid as I had thought it would be...look at Hayley posing for the photogs in all her glory :S
3) First time I found out boys can be so fucking inconsiderate to girls in a moshpit and smoosh them, fling their arms smack to your face, elbow you countless times, smash your glasses, drag you to the floor, pull your hair, not give a fuck if you're on your way to falling flat on the floor. THEY WILL JUST KEEP JUMPING AND BE IN THEIR OWN WORLDS. AND I SWEAR, THIS PRC BOY BESIDE ME WAS GIVING ME HELL WITH HIS DEVIL-MAY-CARE WAYS. THOUGH I SHOUTED AT HIM TO STOP SMOOSHING ME DOWN WITH HIS HAND, HE TURNED HIS HEAD TOAPOLOGISE QUICKLY TO ME BUT WAS BACK TO JUMPING AGAIN THE NEXT SECOND AND HAVING THIS LOOK OF SHEER JOY ON HIS FACE TO HAYLEY ONSTAGE THE NEXT. And those two Ang Moh girls' looks of sheer uncomfortableness from trying to keep their faces away from those adolescent boys pretty much reflected MY state.
4) Therefore, first time I found out only if you have a big strong/tall/solid boyfriend covering your back in the front row can you then think of staying around for the whole concert. There were these two girls in front at the barriers who had their boyfriends snugly positioned behind them and who didn't budge an inch no matter how we tried to shove them out of the way or make ourselves more comfortable.
5) First time I couldn't stop swaying in the moshpit crowd while out front. In a negative sense. I think I couldn't stand up straight for the first 3 songs. I was fighting for survival right there. I was trying to keep my camera out of harm's way with one arm, and fighting to keep my balance with the other arm. I had even resorted to standing sideways as it was a more stable position to anticipate when the crowd was shifting and then shoving the people with my one arm in the other direction to keep myself from falling down. Fucking sprained my back more than once during this period and couldn't keep my body facing the stage at all, and had a really really hard time catching for air. The swaying was especially bad for the people our front center. There were a couple of people who fell down but no one cared and everyone around just stared and stepped on them till only their friends could save pick them up. Look at this blair-witch type vid I took:
6) First time I realized that I paid a concert to have a crash course on how to survive a moshpit and not to watch a show.
7) First time I bitterly felt my body going into fight or flight mode. First time I wanted to get myself the hell out of a moshpit.
8) First time the guards were not doing their jobs. They didn't bother to shout warnings at the crowd or attempt to carry any of the people out front center at all. I was raising and waving my hand frantically at one point to be carried out, but they couldn't care less. I was thinking, 'that's it man. I'm gonna be one of the numerous fatal casualities tonight. God help me.'
9) But in the end, I could only help meself. Because finally first time I had to fight my way from the front to the back of a moshpit.
One thing stuck out in my mind while all this was going down, why did you turn a blind eye to all these goings-on in the moshpit Hayley?? She so saw what was happening, but she just chose to move to the sides of the stage and continue performing. I was like, 'Stop the bloody show and step up and tell off those stupid boys and incosiderate concert newbies in the moshpit! Tell them to take care of others! Argh!' This was what happened at the previous concert like My Chemical Romance and Good Charlotte when the lead singer voiced his concerns for his fans. Yes, I still had time for these thoughts as I was staring at Hayley and her nonexistent concern for us fans. You know what, I think she herself was pretty scared shit of these overenthusiatic boyfans from Singapore, I could see it on her face. And yes, I was that near. I lost a substantial amount of respect for her around that point. I looked at her prancing around onstage and smiling and pretending everything was alright even though she knew something was not quite right in reality. She was indeed living in her performer's fantasy world. Therefore, all the cool rock posturings she did onstage felt pretty contrived to me for those first few songs.
No amount of hardcore headbanging from her could make up for it. I knew that it the end, she just might have felt a little helpless but still had to put on a bravee front for all the other fans present at the stadium that night. I did feel a little sorry for her too. Because still being young, she has these pressures to live up to and learn along the way, like making sure she was looking damn good for those photographers congregrated upfront. And at the same time, I knew that she was actually a sweet girl-not cocky, aggressive or showy, but having to appear so. It didn't help that the sound system was pretty sketchy and bad and she was trying her best to singalong and sound good with the band. You know one of Paramore's songs even had her singing this line 'No oneee, is as lucky as usss' (for the song Where The Lines Overlap), it really felt like so ironic and like she was gloating. hmmph.
[Just for laughs, I'll include this premonition of seeing myself at a moshpit again after so long and which I had emailed Gerald on facebook a couple of weeks prior to the concert:
Uni: ... ... ... i'm just afraid i'm getting too old for moshpits. :P but then again, i decided i can't miss paramore.
Uni: argh, the thought of being in the mosh pit is really putting me off. dunno if i'll really go through with this. :P
Grerald: Why not? What's wrong with the mosh pit!?
Uni: the moshpit is bloody sweaty, bloody hot. ull like, really die of thirst or just collapse if u don't have a strong constitution and mentality. and the music is damn loud. and u get squashed really really badly. if u fall over, ppl will trample on u (hasn't happened to me before though, but i have phobia of that). not only that, if u fall, it's a domino effect. really scary. u get touched, pushed, shoved, especially by perverts or little brats. U get screamed in the ear by some fangirl the whole night. and lastly, ur toes get stepped on whereby your toenails turn black which last for months and they become so unsightly-looking and eventually drop off. enough said? lol
Gerald: LOL. Pretty awesome sum-up of a mosh-pit. I'll gladly swap tickets nonetheless if you freak out at the last minute though! Hahahahaa :D
Just chill and look forward to the concert!!
Uni: if i freak out, i'll sell my ticket. i wouldn't settle for anything less than being in front :P i THINK the last time i was in a moshpit was at singfest last yr. my friends and i were staking out the moshpit area the whole day. none of us wanted to buy food or drinks because then we would lose our positions in the crowd. it was a very horrible experience. promised myself i would never hang out in a moshpit again. that my life was too precious. lol.
Gerald: Oh man, don't do that to me :P
Moshpits are still pretty awesome things!
Uni: no they're not. they seem glamorous and ppl get high but they can be wht nightmares are made of too :P]
But you know what, as soon as I found my sanctuary somewhere near the back of the moshpit, it was like finding the eye of the storm. There was so much more space and actual real air to breathe. Hell, I could even feel that was actually air-conditioning going on at the venue. The people were way saner and tamer but still having a good time (check out the first vid I attempted to record while still being half-alive...). Thankfully, I was able to enjoy the rest of the gig. I stopped freaking out and instead started chilling out, actually enjoying and appreciating Hayley for her undeniably impressive and emotional powerful vocals after that. Especially evident for Paramore's songs: Pressure, Let The Flames Begin and Decode :DD My favourites of the night. And also the fact that she was really making an effort to reach out to the loving crowd and interact with them in her banterings, see an example in this vid for the song Never Let This Go. Yes, I even managed to record somewhat decent videos (though from where I was, the light interfered a lot compared to the actual sight we saw onstage):over here on youtube :) and most of which make me look like I'm at a rave party or something. Told you the fans were way loving that night. Also, getting to relive the concert that night with this chick's darn good videos of Hayley (and that's because as you can see somehow that lucky chick managed to find herself positioned in front of the barriers), you can see that Hayley, ladies and gentlemen, is not a force to be reckoned with onstage. She is an amazing force of energy. Puts all the other lame rockstars to shame. They haven't got a strand of hair on her. Enough said. Watch her at least once in your life live. You'll be spellbound.
And that hair of hers. Now that's another topic for itself. It's just an amazing spectacle. I believe she cut it in such a specific way to make it flow headbangingly perfectly. No scratch that, I think she has a personal hairstylist on tour with her to maintain that cut is just perfect for every night she goes onstage. You gotta see it to believe it. I very well think if a wig was made of Hayley's hair, they would be flying off the shelves. For girls, it's all about the hair. Guys will love you and girls hate you for it.
All in all Paramore, you came, you conquered the scene real quickly in an hour, and left a blaze. And me? I'm glad I got to experience the phenomenom that is Hayley Williams for once in my life. Despite my unforseen misgivings at first, I HAD LIVED OUT MY DREAM OF CATCHING PARAMORE IN ACTION!! I think I can pretty much die happy. Paramore (catchy, anthemic, dramatic live rock-pop act) simply rocks. Like you promised, see you in 5 years' time or less.
To finish off, I dedicate this next song to Hayley, THE headbanging queen. She's the man. Whoever came into the concert that night not knowing who she was damn well knew her and all the strands on her hair by the end of the night I'm sure ;) And you can be sure imma get their Final Riot! concert DVD...soon.
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